The benefits of self-love cannot be taken for granted. It is an important aspect of our overall mental health. When you prioritize and take care of your own needs you can better take care of the needs of others.
The deeper I get into my motherhood journey, the more I understand the power and importance of self-love and the different ways it shows up in my daily life.
Modern society tells us, rather shows us through social media, that moms can ‘do it all’. Take care of the little ones, the household, your partner and everything in between. But at the end of the day who is taking care of Mama?
When I get stuck on the hamster wheel of life I am not showing up as the best version of myself.
During tough times it is easy to fall back on bad habits and negative self-talk, both of which can contribute to low self-esteem. However, it is during this time that you need to counter this state with balance and self love.
Once practicing this, the benefits of self love over took my life.
Realizing how much of my own care I was putting on the back burner, I took the important step of prioritizing my needs through self love.
Countless good things have come from this practice. Such as taking better care of myself, high self-esteem, focusing on the best way to nurture myself through a healthy diet, and becoming more comfortable in my own skin, to name a few.
What is the true meaning of self love?
Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological, and spiritual growth.
Some understand self-love as self-compassion. Dr. Kristin Neff, associate professor of Human Development and Culture at the University of Texas, pioneered the research on self-compassion. Neff’s work outlines the three elements of self-compassion: self-kindness vs. self-judgement, common humanity vs. isolation and mindfulness vs. over-identification.
Self-kindness is being gentle to yourself during difficult times. Common humanity is recognizing that your experience is a shared human experience. What you are going through is not happening to only you, you are not alone. Mindfulness requires you to live through balance, not allowing negative self-talk to take over.
Self-love works in a powerful way. The more self-love you give yourself, the more positive changes you begin to see in all areas of your life. Self-love means honoring everything you bring to the present moment. Past failures and flaws are gifts of experience that allow you to expand as a human being. Hard times are openings to greater understanding.
Truly loving yourself is holding yourself to a high regard.
Self-love means showing up for yourself as you would show up for a best friend. Granting yourself grace when needed. Protecting your emotional and mental health. Honoring your past experiences as a badge of personal growth.
Why loving yourself is extremely important?
As a caregiver of others one of the most important things to do is to take care of yourself. We can not operate at our highest potential when our own needs are depleted and our well is dry. Prioritizing yourself through self love allows you to be the best version of yourself.
There are many opportunities during your motherhood journey to question your decisions and plague yourself with the little voice of should haves and could haves. We do this because we so desperately want to get it all right. However, this constant pursuit of perfectionism can lead to harsh self-criticism and poor self-esteem.
When you are living through self love, all of your actions are aligned through a state of inner peace. You do not have to justify thoughts and doings because they are coming from a place of spiritual growth.
You accept that you are not perfect and treat yourself through a lens of understanding and forgiveness. And, the compassion you have for yourself naturally extends to others.
What are the benefits of self love?
Once you start practicing self love, you will notice the positive changes that begin to take place in your daily life.
Higher self-esteem
When practicing self love you come to realize that it is okay for others to not always agree with you. Should you be rejected or told ‘no’, you have confidence that the situation was not right for you. Your inner critic becomes silenced because you know you put your full self forward and you are okay with the way you showed up.
Gain higher self-compassion
Self-compassion means showing the same empathy, acceptance and love that you would give others to yourself. You grant yourself kindness and understanding during times of personal short comings without negative judgement. You gain the ability to not personalize every bad thing that happens. You observe and honor your feelings and thoughts as they are.
Healthy relationships
As you have a healthier and better relationship with yourself, you will surround yourself around people who reflect your best interests and values. You will learn to set boundaries and say ‘no’ to things that do not serve your needs. When you show up authentically people will learn how to show up for you.
Overall better health
One of the great benefits of self love is you will become more aware of your self-care and learn to make healthy choices. This will be reflective in better mental health as you mindfully prioritize your needs. You will also have better physical health as you develop healthier habits that treat your body in a respectful way such as exercise and healthy eating habits.
Reduces levels of stress
When all of the benefits of self-love begin to manifest you will experience lower levels of stress. When your relationships are healthy your stress levels are lower. When you have high self-esteem, your stress levels are lower. When you have good health, your stress is lower. In the long run, as self love becomes a part of life, you will reduce levels of stress.
Boost confidence
When your self love is high, confidence follows. Your confidence comes from self acceptance and a connection to your purpose. It comes from being happy with where you are in life.
Increase happiness
The more you practice self love, the happier you will be. Law of attraction comes in to play. The world around you begins to reflect the great work you have been doing. Your own happiness begins to radiate.
Increase energy
Being a ‘yes’ person and always showing up for others takes energy. Learning to prioritize your time actually conserves your energy. As you learn to say ‘no’, you make room for the things you actually want to do. Valuing your energy is an important aspect of self love.
Increase productivity
Through self love you understand failures and defeats to be learning and growth opportunities. You embrace the challenge and do not dwell in the negative. Staying positive and calm allows you to remain productive through difficult situations.
Stronger resilience
Self love requires you to not look away. It requires you to stand up for yourself and what you believe. It means having boundaries and saying no when needed. You will build resilience every time you honor your true self.
Positive attitude
In the face of failure and times of adversity, self love grants you grace. You replace negative thoughts with positive feedback.
Greater sense of self-worth
You are worthy of love. Positive self-talk comes from self love. You do not need to compare yourself to others. As you practice self love you learn to value every aspect of what you bring to the moment. You have a high esteem and inner strength that is rooted in your core values.
Greater life satisfaction
Knowing that you are a part of the larger human experience, you see each moment as a growth opportunity. As the pressure to be perfect and right takes a back seat you come to a greater appreciation for who you are.
What is self love for moms?
Self love for moms is important because you are constantly giving yourself to others. You are needed and you are wanted. Everything shared in this post can be applied to your mom journey. How do you show up for the ones you care most about?
When you practice self love, you show up full. That means your well of compassion, patience and understanding is running over. You show up with a high self-esteem. You understand that you are not perfect and may not have all of the answers.
The way you show up for others is a reflection of the way you show up for yourself. What better way to live by example for your little one?
How to practice self love as a mom
The easy way to practice self love as a mom is to just start. The first step is to look at your lifestyle and come to an understanding of your definition of self-love. Explore what self love means to you. It can look different for everyone as we are all at different stages in our lives.
A great way to start is to make a quick list of 10 things you can do that will begin your self love journey. Some ideas may include:
Journaling
Journaling can be a powerful tool to process past experiences, understand current situations aiding in personal growth. It can be an opportunity to clear your mind of stress and worries allowing you to prioritize your needs and wants.
Positive self-talk through affirmations
Your words have meaning and shape your world view. What we say about ourselves becomes our beliefs. Our beliefs become our actions. Our actions shape our reality. It is so important to fill yourself with positive affirmations and not allow negative self-talk to set in.
Nurture your spiritual needs
When you are in go mode all the time, It can be easy to neglect your spiritual needs. But often life gives us burdens that are too heavy a load to carry on your own. Nurturing the surrender and letting go to a higher intelligence when you can not see or understand the outcome will free you of so much stress and worry.
Explore different forms of meditation practice
Through meditation you come to know yourself on a deeper level without judgement. It is a powerful way to build and nurture a relationship with our own selves.
Carve out dedicated time for exercise
When we are busy taking care of others, one of the first things to go is finding time to prioritize an exercise routine. But the benefits of exercise are too important to miss. Not only does regular exercise protect you from physical aliments such as heart disease, high blood pressure, weight gain, but it also has endless mental health benefits as well. Through exercise you can manage stress, improve your mood and energy.
Plan healthy meals and snacks for yourself
Show yourself love through the foods that you eat. When practicing self love you come to understand that your body is your vessel. You want to supply it with nutrient rich, whole foods. Eating well is so important to sustaining energy and fuel. Plan your meals and snacks just as you would your little one. It is important to be mindful of the foods you eat.
Go to bed early
There is no greater gift that you can give yourself than sleep. The need for sleep is underrated. Restoration of your body and mind is essential. Prioritize a good night sleep. Establish a night time routine and add a sleep meditation for optimal whine down. You deserve it!
Schedule quality time with friends
Spending time with your friends is important for your mental well-being. Your friends are your support system. Your sounding board. Your reminder of who you are outside of ‘mom’. Nurture your relationships. You need them on your mom journey, sometimes more than you may know. Try and schedule a dinner with friends at least twice a month.
Take up a new hobby
Stimulate and challenge your mind with learning new things. Hobbies can be a great way to socialize, relieve stress, and promote happiness. This is one is a fun benefit of self love!
Regularly pamper yourself with self-care
Just do it. Self-care for moms really can happen every day. Whether it is getting your nails done, going for a long walk, taking a bath, or spending an extra 10 minutes at the end of the day on your night routine, show yourself some love through self-care.
Enjoy the benefits of self love
Once you get into the groove of truly taking care of yourself, enjoy it. Take pause throughout your day to recognize the little gems of self love you are doing.
It can’t be stated enough -the very best way you can care for others is to care for yourself. Incorporating self love into your mom journey will be a freeing experience. The love you give yourself will radiate outward, positively touching everyone around you. It is a beautiful holistic experience.
The practice of self love is at the root of incorporating wellness into our daily lives.
Self love is a life journey. Once you are aware of the powerful benefits of self love it will be easy to incorporate it into every aspect of your real life. Grant yourself grace as it is a practice. Over time it will become second nature.
Practicing self love is one of the best things I have done for myself. Nothing but positive things have manifested.
To me, self-love feels like I always have a best friend looking out for me in every aspect of my life. And I do, me. I have learned to be my own best friend. As a result, I can take better care of others and live in true happiness.
Remember, be kind to yourself through grace and understanding.
I hope you find some whispers and helpful information that resonate for you on the importance of self-love.